October 21, 2025
Hi Friends,
The town was small and the roads were dark. I drove past a large church where the parking lot was full but dark. I found the Tim Horton’s I was looking for in a strip mall, attached to a cash and carry gas station, a beacon of light in an dismally lit parking lot. My bladder was signaling that it had been an hour and a half drive to this town from my last coffee meeting and that coffee is, indeed, a diuretic. Thankfully, I was early, so I had time to use the restroom and go over my notes before my meeting.
The Tim Horton’s was “small-town clean” as was the attached convenience store, visible through an archway that joined the two businesses. Seeing no restroom sign in the coffee shop, I poked my head into the convenience store and asked for the restroom. With a pained look, a very nice employee informed me that the restroom wasn’t working. I reminded myself not to panic (at my age, “holding it” is both highly overrated and highly unpredictable). I wandered back into the Tim’s and, low and behold, salvation was at hand — a restroom.
It would be too much information to recount the next couple of minutes of my life that night but, suffice it to say I was much relieved and much more able to focus as I sat down at an empty table in a completely empty restaurant to review my meeting notes. That’s why I was surprised.
A haughty, gravelly voice barked out, “There’s no loitering here. These tables are for our customers. If you’re not buying anything, you have to leave!” I looked up to see that the voice belonged to a person looking like Gran Stonewell from “The Croods” but with a better hairdo. I was taken totally off guard. Then the questions started: Do I look like a vagrant? Is the coffee shop empty because it’s been reserved for a party? Why are you so angry, lady?
I looked up, smiled (maybe I’m just hoping I smiled) and replied quietly, “I’m meeting a friend here and he hasn’t arrived yet.” Without so much as a harumph, she turned her back and returned to the food preparation area.
It’s funny how that brief interaction tends to overwhelm what was a very good meeting at the end of a very good evening. I’m put in mind of several scripture verses: “Do not judge, or you too will be judged.” ”But I tell you that everyone will have to give account on the day of judgment for every empty word they have spoken. For by your words you will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned.” “Love is kind.” “Clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.”
It’s not funny to be judged or harangued by someone who’s foisting their problems on you. It’s not funny to be judged and lectured by a “know it all” who doesn’t know you.
May God give us grace to never bear witness this way because no one wins. Jesus’ words seem apropos: “If you had known what these words mean, ‘I desire mercy, not sacrifice,’ you would not have condemned the innocent.”
Blessings!
Doug