July 21st, 2026

Dear Friends,

He didn’t choose me; I chose him, and that surprised him. Yet, he consented and the result was a relationship that shaped my life for many years (and still does, through my memories of him). He didn’t pretend to be perfect and I didn’t expect him to be so. We didn’t agree on some things and, honestly, I can’t remember what those things were — but I can tell you that they didn’t matter. Even when he moved to another country, he kept in touch. If he was going to be in town, he let me know and we almost always got together.

It was a strange mentorship in that he only rebuked me once in all those years. I can’t ever remember him trying to “teach” me, in the traditional sense of that word, yet he taught me so many things. Our conversations and our prayer meetings were his classroom. 

He taught me not to complain or to hold people up to selfish expectations. He always had used envelopes in his pockets and they always had a handwritten list of names on them because people were what ministry was about. He always paid for a meal before I even got a chance to ask for the bill because he was generous. He prayed about everything. He lamented failure in others and yet forgave them and pressed on anyway. He let churches to grow. He wrote articles for the larger Chinese community, wherever he was.

Much of whatever I have become as a pastor has been shaped by a handful of men. One of them was Henry Chou. As I reflect back on our relationship, I realize that I never questioned his authority or his wisdom. I also never questioned his commitment to me or his interest in me. I would have learned a lot less and been impacted a lot less had I done so.

Like choosing a mentor, our life with God begins with a choice. Unlike choosing a mentor, that choice begins with God. He invites us into relationship with him and that relationship only works and grows to the degree we are willing to obey him. He doesn’t expect blind obedience (“Taste me, and see that I am good.”) and he doesn’t expect unquestioning obedience (“Love the Lord your God … with all your mind.”) but he does expect absolute obedience. There are not various ‘level of obedience’ options. It’s simple — we choose to yield and obey, or we don’t. And that will make all the difference in our lives.

Many of us live with the illusion that we can curate our relationship with God, cherry picking those parts that we like and ignoring the rest. Friends, that is not our choice to make. We can choose to ignore his revelation and live without reference to him. We can choose to live in continuing and growing obedience to him. We can’t be partly committed. 

We don’t get to put God on trial, though we can try. He doesn’t have to explain himself to us. And we don’t have to like that. Nevertheless, it is the way things are. We are the creature; he is the creator. We are the servant; he is the Master. Thus, the pursuit of wisdom and a good life begins in a simple way. “Choose this day whom you will serve.” “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom.” “Seek first his kingdom and his righteousness …” “The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord.”

I will never regret my choice of mentor. But that good choice pales next to the choice of choosing to submit unconditionally (though not unquestioningly) to God.

Blessings!

Doug